On my first read I was surprised to find anger arising. I have a tendency to read quickly in order to get something, a message, then move on to something else. But, this piece didn’t give that automatic mechanism what it wanted.
I read it again and these words felt like a punch in the solar plexus "Effort that doesn’t arrive anywhere. It only becomes more effort. What I eventually saw was language that didn’t move with the moment.”
I realized the anger was a terror of stopping and looking at what is actually happening in the moment instead of being taken over by thought patterns. Why or what is afraid of looking? Or, is that the wrong question?
Hi Glenda, what stands out is your noticing of the movement to get somewhere: to get the message, move on, arrive. That already feels like an important observation. That's observing exactly the movement I was trying to write about.
Your last question is important too. I don't know that I'd ask what is afraid, though I've asked that at times too. I wonder whether it's enough to notice that fear is here, without making any judgment of that. This kind of small shift has often changed my relationship to fear.
Kate, I just read your article again this morning and it was if I was reading something totally different than a few days ago. It is strange how I knew your writing was touching me, but did not know how. For days now I have been noticing that my words do not match “now”.
Your words “ it moved preoccupied by a story about Kate that had been decided long ago. A story that kept telling the same Kate into being.” , is exactly what I am experiencing. Thank you, your words resonate with me and work on me over time....
On my first read I was surprised to find anger arising. I have a tendency to read quickly in order to get something, a message, then move on to something else. But, this piece didn’t give that automatic mechanism what it wanted.
I read it again and these words felt like a punch in the solar plexus "Effort that doesn’t arrive anywhere. It only becomes more effort. What I eventually saw was language that didn’t move with the moment.”
I realized the anger was a terror of stopping and looking at what is actually happening in the moment instead of being taken over by thought patterns. Why or what is afraid of looking? Or, is that the wrong question?
Hi Glenda, what stands out is your noticing of the movement to get somewhere: to get the message, move on, arrive. That already feels like an important observation. That's observing exactly the movement I was trying to write about.
Your last question is important too. I don't know that I'd ask what is afraid, though I've asked that at times too. I wonder whether it's enough to notice that fear is here, without making any judgment of that. This kind of small shift has often changed my relationship to fear.
Thank you Kate. Your feedback is very helpful.
You're welcome, Glenda.
Kate, I just read your article again this morning and it was if I was reading something totally different than a few days ago. It is strange how I knew your writing was touching me, but did not know how. For days now I have been noticing that my words do not match “now”.
Your words “ it moved preoccupied by a story about Kate that had been decided long ago. A story that kept telling the same Kate into being.” , is exactly what I am experiencing. Thank you, your words resonate with me and work on me over time....
Beautifully expressed ❤️
Thank you, Ruth.